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Phase One of Mister's Birthday

Issue Date: Thursday, Jan. 22, 2004

Sooo excited.

Tonight is a wine tasting at Lawry’s Steak House. Have I ever been to Lawry’s? Nope. Have I ever been to a wine tasting? Nope. Do I even drink wine? Nopey nope nope. So why am I so durn excited? (Yes, I spelled durn that way on purpose… moving along.) I am excited because it is Phase One of Mister’s Birthday.

His birthday is not even until the second Sunday of next month, but hey… I’m an over achiever. Quit it, stop laughing.

I’m excited because it is his favorite wine in the world and… annnnnnnnnnd, we get to eat real food. Yay me! So clever.


I thought I asked you to stop laughing.

So, real food for me and a lot of red wine for Mister tonight. Yep, it’s gonna be great!

Phase Two of his birthday may include most or all of the following:
a very perfect birthday present
a box for said present to be wrapped in
ribbon or decorations for present
some hot Suz lovin’
a private recital for him to be preformed by me
small multi-colored poodle
unusually large unicycle
flaming bowling pins
an antique squeeze box
the theme to Dallas
white patent leather Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader boots
and glitter…. Lots of glitter… A’La Rip Taylor.

Of course I can’t reveal the present for true! Mister may stumble upon this site and the surprise will be ruined.

For some reason I first typed Rip Torn in the place of Rip Taylor. Sorry, Men In Black guy. When I IMDB’d* Rip Torn I couldn’t imagine him ever throwing confetti at people. Rip Taylor is SO Hollywood Squares… pre-Whoopi. Not that post-Whoopi is any worse.

*When I just used IMDB as a verb, it reminded me of an entry by Robin. She used ass as a verb. As in “He assed me.” Bottom of the page. No really, go read it. This woman cracks me up. I have such a girl crush on her.

Tomorrow is the Clarin’s facial at Sak’s Fifth Avenue after work for Mister and I. Yay! We are SO getting some more of that blue relaxing tranquility shower gel. That stuff is ambrosia of the gods. Ambrosia I say!

Well, it is after five and the man (Mister) is on his way to pick me up. We’re taking one car so he can drink as much wine as he wants. After all, it is his birthday.

Have a great Thursday!


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To understand this dear reward (above) at all, you must hie thee on and read gatsby’s grape ape entry and my comments.

And because of said comments he sent me my very own dream turtle in an email titled wee gift with these words attached, “my purple monkey is booked solid so i ordered you a tangerine turtle. hope he proves helpful.”

The Graphic Below Courtesy of Papernapkin.

My Amazon Wish List.

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