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“What in the world is that woman cackling on about?”

Issue Date: Friday, Jun. 01, 2007

Hi. I am a spoiled brat.

Mister wanted to pick up a new flat screen monitor over the weekend. And as an incentive for him to work on tunneling through; all naked mole rat-like; the impressively stacked and strewn about detritus that is his home office (seriously, the door has been shut for almost a year, except when we want to stash something visitor vision unfriendly, like a shop vac) I was all for the purchase. And even more so when he was all, “And what kind of prize would you like?”

Hmmm. What would I like? Other than to sing “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” as a duet with Meatloaf, pre- “I'd Do Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)”.

I know. I would like a new 80 gig frillion generation color iPod. Yes, barring the chance that I may get to sing with Meatloaf prior to even the wee early decade hours of the 80’s?... Yes, that is what I want. The iPod.

I can do what now?... I can play movies and television shows and cartoons and watch it on the pretty impressive screen of this thing? I can download Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law and watch it? Seriously. No, seriously.

Holy shit... by the way. Finally watched the last two new episodes of Ugly Betty and Grey’s Anatomy Sunday night until like 2 am. Y’all should have warned me. Seriously. I was a big ball of miserable wailing and snot (you want me, I can see it in your eyes) when the... You’ve all seen them right? Oh shit. I don’t wanna spoil it for anyone, so y’all... leave comments, let me know if it is cool to go on and on about these four episodes. Last two of each, Ugly Betty and Grey’s Anatomy. Tell me, quick.

I suck because I have been keeping them as a treat for myself for weeks and sticking my fingers in my ears all “LA LA LA!” when anyone even tried to mention them. Sorry mike.

So, got the iPod. His name is Spencer. He is Herschel’s big brother. And now Mister? Has Herschel. I upgraded and he got the hand me down. This is the first time in the history of ever (technology related) that this has ever happened in our household. And it? Is awesome.

My laptop? Is an Apple II that Mister purchased from a Mennonite back in 1977. And Mister’s all... “Why don’t you write your little updates here at home, as opposed to staying late at the office? You could write them on the laptop and then post them here. From Home.” Do you guys get the feeling he’s trying to tell me something? I do, but I just can’t decipher the code.

Anyway. So, I got Spencer, he is set up and I have like 12 episodes of Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law already set and ready. I am just waiting to get on the plane on Sunday (headed to San Antonio... call me... love you) and put my little earphones in and watch them one after the other and laugh heartily and make people think that I have lost my mind. “What in the world is that woman cackling on about?” Like they do here at the office when I read stuff like... this, this or this.

So yes, I am spoiled. New iPod and... momma’s got some new shoes. Imagine this. Brown/Bordeaux-ish eel skin mules with 2.5 inched stacked heel. Are you imagining? Good, because I am wearing them on my feet right now. They are hot.

See? Look.

It is a bitch to take a picture of your own feet. But aren’t they the cutest ever?

Okay. I have a gajillion things that I want to tell all of you... and maybe I will on my Mastodon 2001 B.C. laptop over the weekend.


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To understand this dear reward (above) at all, you must hie thee on and read gatsby’s grape ape entry and my comments.

And because of said comments he sent me my very own dream turtle in an email titled wee gift with these words attached, “my purple monkey is booked solid so i ordered you a tangerine turtle. hope he proves helpful.”

The Graphic Below Courtesy of Papernapkin.

My Amazon Wish List.

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